Quick thought on fun.

I like to wear my socks on hardwood floors and slide around. Although stairs can be treacherous.

Photo's of the Day

Daniel and I near Xingping Town on the River Li in the Guangxi Province.
We paid this lady like 10 cents to hold up these ducks and get our pics taken.
They actually use these ducks to fish, by putting something in its throat, and putting a line around its feet they allow them to go under water and fish but the duck cant swallow the fish and the fisherman grabs the fish out, but he has to let the duck eat every once in a while or else it wises up and stops fishing!

To Sleep or not to Sleep?

To sleep or not to sleep that is the question.
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing end them. To die: to sleep.

Here's the first few lines of Hamlet's famous soliloquy, note the first line is mine.
I have a problem with sleep. At night when the bed and pillow beckon unto me I do but hesitate its languorous call.
I have always had a hard time deciding to go to bed, granted once I am there I have no problem falling asleep.
And I think thats due to my status of staying up so late and having to succumb to my drowsiness.
For me, going to bed means I will be missing out on life. On seeing, doing or feeling something that life has to offer. And so I choose to stay up as late as possible to experience life when most of the time I'm not really doing much but getting tired.
Funny thing happens in the morning.
I don't care about experiencing life. As I stuporly awake for the first time in the morning I feel robbed of my opportunity to avoid life. In the morning, I want to continue sleeping to avoid having to live in this world. That may sound drastic but its true. Thats when I pray the most that I be called to my eternal home. To be taken away from this faraway country and finally find eternal peace and rest in my forever home. And I reckon thats where Hamlet comes in. He knew what it meant for me when I wake in the morning...to fight the slings and arrows of this broken world but rather than opposing them I would rather sleep!! And if I must wake I pray for my safe passage to my real home.

Anyone else have similar or dissimilar ways of thinking, feeling or dealing with sleep? Just curious about others experiences.

Because God has made it plain to them

Heres the thing about change...When you think you've changed for the better all you've done is exchange one addiction with another.
I got that from a TV show I watched tonight.
So true. And an addiction is simply what we idolatrize in life. Its when we transfer worship and homage to some power or object other than God. That can be anything, from vices to "virtues". Aside from all those vices we all know about, its the virtues, the good things that are more easily made into idols. Your addiction, your idolatry could be pleasing your parents, seeking acceptance in friends, gaining approval from co-workers, desiring a loving relationship, loving your children too much. All of those things can become addictions and idols. One of the scariest books I've ever read was CS Lewis's "The Great Divorce". The reason it was scary was because it showed how even "good" people can turn "good" things into addictions and idols. (Its a must read for everyone)
Ever wonder why you feel distant from God even though there is no external and clearly visible idol or addiction in your life.
I bet its not a vice thats keeping you from the peace of God but something that God created for good that has been distorted by our sinful nature and put above God.
Idolatry in any form will result in moral decline and in guilt.
Here is something I read from JI Packer tonight..."Fallen humankind is in one sense ignorant of God, since what people like to believe, and in fact believe, about the objects of their worship falsifies and distorts the revelation of God they cannot escape.
In another sense, however, all human beings remain aware of God, guiltily, with uncomfortable inklings of coming judgement that they wish they did not have. Only the gospel of Christ can speak peace to this distressful aspect of the human condition."

Archiving Quotes & Thoughts

This means there are new thoughts and quotes on the sidebar!! Yippee! I really enjoyed this weeks quotes.


Quotes for the Week
But often, in the world's most crowded streets, But often, in the din of strife, There rises an unspeakable desire. After the knowledge of our buried life; A thirst to spend our fire and restless force. In tracking out our true, original course. A longing to inquire. Into the mystery of this heart which beats. So wild, so deep in us- to know. Whence our lives come and where they go. - Matthew Arnold

Across my foundering deck shone. A beacon, an eternal beam. Flesh fade, and mortal trash. Fall to the residuary worm; world's wildfire, leave but ash; In a flash, at trumpet crash, I am all at once what Christ is, since he was what I am, and this Jack, joke, poor potsherd, patch, matchwood, immortal diamond, Is immortal diamond. -Gerard Manley Hopkins

"Faith means you want God and want to want nothing else." Brennan Manning

Thoughts for the Week
First thought...My sleep patterns are back to normal after China. The routine has started to settle back into its normal course. I am both pleasantly pleased by this yet slightly disturbed at the same time. Trying to fight against the normalcy and complacently that is so easy to slide back into amidst the comfortable confines of our American lifestyle. I am not upset about our condition because I know each culture desires comfort but what I am concerned with is my casual indifference towards those who suffer.

Public Relations. It sounds like an official term but we all take part in it. Its a funny thing that our deepest desires is to be wholly known and to wholly know others and yet we put on so many different masks. We are afraid that if we take off our masks we will be rejected by others. And therein lies the problem; we fear more the rejection of others than believe in the acceptance from God.

I enjoy those days when my body seems quite rested and the land laid out before me seem quite deep and distant as if I'm living on a different plane from that which surrounds me. This speaks to me of Heaven

Old Journal Entry

I picked up one of my old journals tonight. Whew! What a mixed bag of emotions. I actually dropped it at what point because of the emotions it brought back. I wasn't very happy with myself. : )
Anyway. I wrote in my journal a couple of years ago while I was spending time with some newlywed friends of mine.
What follows is my reflections and dialogue with my friend about marriage, relationships and life.
Hanging out with them for the weekend was my first real experience of seeing close friends in a marriage relationship.
To frame the story a little bit it might be important to tell you that when I wrote it I had just gotten out of a year and a half long relationship, so suffice it to say my spirits weren't very high.
So you might ask, why put this on my blog? It is a revealing piece of writing but the emotions I was dealing with did come to a good conclusion and I believe the message can be applied to all of life. And isn't that what this blog is all about?

A Night's Conversation with a Newlywed friend who I will call Robert and his wife Cindy.

The cars are ceaselessly passing by the duplex. The sun stained man next door is getting into his red truck and is reaching for what looks like a 12 pack of beer while he takes a drag on his cigarette. It was 88 during the afternoon and now I need to wear a jacket. The weathered man has come out again. My back is facing him but I hear his slippers scuff the sidewalk as he drags his feet. I wonder why he drags his feet. Maybe it has something to do with what he came to out to his car for. Speaking of cars, these cars in front of me ceaselessly cruise by my second story porch. I saw a car get run off into the grass today. A van came over on him. I heard the screech before I turned and saw the car swerve off the freeway onto the sloped grassy embankment. I played frogger today on Atari. I wonder if I could make it across this ten lane interstate.
Robert and Cindy are taking a walk. I've asked them a lot of questions in my two days here.
"Robert do you ever get bored? You know how it was back in college. The weekend would roll around and we'd be bored trying to figure out what to do and so we would entrust our night to a big group of people who were bored together hoping that seven or eight minds were better than one or two. Then it would come down to watching a movie. I mean isn't it the same thing in a marriage? But instead you’re just bored with your wife?"
Robert seemed to be interested in the question but his response was not what I was looking for. Robert looked up and said, "Well, we watch the Simpson’s together, ride bikes, we go see movies a lot."
I disappointedly replied, "Yeah, it seems that life is always the same. Instead of being bored in a group you’re bored with one person. Its just a new dilemma, a new situation."
"I don't get bored with Cindy", responded Robert. "You do have times when you don't have anything to say to one another, when there is just silence."
"Yeah", I replied, "I guess it’s like that with anyone. Joc and I got to the point where we had stopped saying new things but simply talked about our day."
"Cindy and I do that a lot. It's a good thing we don't see each other all day; that way we have things to talk about."
Deep inside of me I felt this yearning for something more than that. I wanted to have that adventure of discovery occur throughout the relationship, for it to be never ending. I was poking around trying to see if being married changed anything or if it really meant the spark and adventure would disappear. I had been watching them. There were moments of sparks and new dialogue here and there but they weren't deep. I often saw Cindy's listless eyes and it bothered me; but I was probably reading too much into it.
Robert interrupted my thoughts,” But we do clean up the house together."
That wouldn't take long I thought. They only have three rooms.
Then it dawned on me its not about being bored or entertained from one stage of life to the next. Its about choosing not to be bored. Its about being satisfied with where your at and enjoying who your with at the moment. It’s about enjoying what you have on this earth no matter the circumstance. If its grey and rainy, if your single and lonely, if its bright and sunny, if your with your friends or with your spouse.
And I have come to realize you can only do that with a daily renewal of your spirit and committing yourself over to the Lord's will and living within and pouring out his love each day.

And that is the end of the journal entry I wrote two years ago.
I would say I have learned a lot in two years. I feel more comfortable about life, about marriage. I think I have been able to to more frequently take to heart the conclusion I made two years ago. Some days I forget though and I think thats why I needed to post this little story.
I need to remind myself more often.

The Boxer Rebellion

If anyone has read the 19 posts in my Saints Soldiers entry then you would understand my posting of this fight night way back in March in Puerto Rico. Be sure to turn up the volume on your computer.

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Posted by deconbrodi

Divine

Here is my pic for Photo Friday.....a site where you post a picture that defines the word of the week...the word for this week was divine. Okay so I added two but I had much more I could have posted!
(And dont worry the boxing pics are coming soon)

Interested in knowing more about this website....click on below link.
http://www.photofriday.com/how.php

Saints and Soldiers

I just watched this movie last night and was thoroughly impressed with it and reccomend it to be watched.

The Plot line, which is based on Actual Events:
Five American soldiers fighting in Europe during World War II struggle to return to Allied territory after being separted from U.S. forces during the historic Malmedy Massacre.
Why I liked it? Aside from the fact it won 7 best picture awards at 7 different film festivals. It's not simply a war movie in step with the Saving Private Ryan type but it actually takes a more in depth and personal look at each of the soldiers. It has a very powerful and emotional touch that tugs at your heart. And unlike most war movies where you typically want to watch fight scenes you root for these guys to avoid them because you want them to live. What I particlarly enjoyed was the character Deacon's interactions with the Medic Steven Gould. Deacon was a missionary in Berlin before the war and has faith in God which irritates Gould who believes the war has proven there is no God. Their talks and deepening friendship amdist the suffering of war makes the movie well worth the watch, especially with the emotional payoff at the end. It is a great story of love amongst the atrocities of war.
I am probably going to end of buying the movie.

For all of those who dont like War movies....meaning all you women out there. : )
There is no gratuitous violent or bloody scenes. There are battle scenes but no real blood and guts. The movie is PG-13. The director and producers wanted to make it watchable for families. So that will put you at ease and gives no one an excuse to watch one of the years best movies.

Settling Accounts and Discovering Johnny Cash

According to Christianity Today one of Johnny Cash's favorite Bible verses was Romans 8:13
"For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live."

Simple and to the point. And apparently appropriate for the "man in black". He really associated with Paul. A man with a very sinful past much like his own. There is something deeply authentic about Johnny Cash. You dont look at him and see a mask. He is not hiding behind self-righteousness but fully aware of God's love and grace in his life.
Wouldn't it be nice if we all had a little more self-depreciation and less pride, and more of really believing that God is the
"I am" and that we are the "I am not". Instead of accepting others and loving them as they are we demand that they meet our expectations and our wants.
So what happened to the Gospel? To love God and our neighbor as ourself? What happened to being like Christ, who lowered himself humbly to meet us where we are? Instead we demand our selfish desires to be met. We are all guilty of it. But we need to practice more of what we preach and extend that grace to eachother. That is why ultimately we cling to Christ.

We call God our Father and yet we fight amongst our brothers.
We are to be the light upon the hill and yet there is no light behind closed doors.
We are to be the salt of the earth but how, when we can't salt our church?
We hold accounts when our account was settled long ago
We keep tabs and call for justice when its not for you or I
We think and ponder and say Amen
When we consider how we must be right
Alas our selfish deeds keep us from the light
So thank the good Lord for the grace to see us through,
For clinging to what He's given is all we have to do.

The following are poignant lyrics from Johnny Cash's song, "Old Account was Settled Long Ago."
(Too bad the sons and daughters of Christ fail in extending that grace to eachother.

Long ago (down on my knees)
Long ago (I setted it all)
Yes, the old account was settled long ago; (Hallelujah!)
And the record's clear today,
For He washed my sins away,
When the old account was settled long ago.
There was a time on earth,
When in the book of Heav'n
An old account was standing
For sins yet unforgiv'n;
My name was at the top,
And many things below,
I went unto the keeper,
And settled long ago.

Long ago (down on my knees)
Long ago (I setted it all)
Yes, the old account was settled long ago; (Hallelujah!)
And the record's clear today,
For He washed my sins away,
When the old account was settled long ago.
The old account was large,
And growing ev'ry day,
For I was always sinning,
And never tried to pay;
But When I looked ahead,
And saw such pain and woe,
I said that I would settle,
I settled long ago.

Long ago (down on my knees)
Long ago (I setted it all)
Yes, the old account was settled long ago; (Hallelujah!)
And the record's clear today,
For He washed my sins away,
When the old account was settled long ago.
When in that happy home,
My Saviour's home above,
I'll sing redemption's story,
And praise Him for His love;
I'll not forget that book,
With pages white as snow,
Because I came and settled,
And settled long ago.

Long ago (down on my knees)
Long ago (I setted it all)
Yes, the old account was settled long ago; (Hallelujah!)
And the record's clear today,
For He washed my sins away,
When the old account was settled long ago.

Thanks Johnny...I look forward to seeing you on the other side.

Archiving Quotes and Thoughts for your thorough Enjoyment

"When our lives are through, we will regret only that we loved too little, never that we loved too much." "But if I love others, I will be vulnerable; I will appear weak; I may get hurt. Remember, someday you'll be dead. It won't last forever. So while you still have life, love everybody you can love. Love them as much as you can love them. Love freely." - Rich Mullins

To love without expectations. To love without demanding change. To love without not wanting something in return. This is what it means to love. It is not conjuring up a warm fuzzy feeling but rather an act of will and a choice in behavior to surrender to self and put others above yourself.
One secret act of self-denial, one sacrifice of inclination to duty, is worth all the mere good thoughts, warm feelings, and passionate prayers in which idle people indulge themselves. - Cardinal John Henry Newman

"A being of higher faculties requires more to make him happy, is capable probably of more acute suffering, and certainly accesible to it at more points, than one of an inferior type; but in spite of these liabilities, he can never really wish to sink into what he feels to be a lower grade of existence."
"Eccentricity has always abounded when and where strength of character has abounded; and the amount of eccentricity in a society has generally been proportional to the amount of genius, mental vigor, and moral courage which it contained."
"Ask yourself whether you are happy and you cease to be so." - John Stuart Mill

Top Thoughts
I have all of sudden gotten very nostalgic.(It actually happens quite often on the grandest of scales) I am listening to Louis Armstrong right now, just finished up with some Bing Crosby and Bobby Darin. "A kiss to build a dream on." Ah what a nice sentiment to dwell on. The past always seems to be better than the present doesnt it? We live in the past and look forward to the future and forget to live in the present.

So have you ever read the Sermon on the Mount? Its pretty amazing stuff. So your suppose to love your enemey? Mourn over your sin? Submit to God? Have peace in God? Live by faith rather than works? Turn the other cheek? Give to the needy? Pray? Not store up treasure on earth? Not worry? Dont judge others? Wow, what a list. You know some churches used to believe the purpose of the Sermon on the Mount was to show us how sinful we were because of the seemingly unreachable task of living out what the Sermon preaches. All too often I find myself admiring Jesus and not living like him. The difference between the two is the difference between heaven and hell.

Within the last couple years I have realized something about myself. That even though I may get meloncholy at times that all the drama in our lives that seem to dictate so much really adds up to less than a hill of beans. A healthy dose of indifference never hurt anyone and once you start taking the pill it makes life more enjoyable.

Helping those in China

I had someone ask me what they could do to to help the people in China and in case you missed my comment in my previous entry, I thought I would give it its own article.

Firstly and most importantly, pray for their continued saftey, the strengthening of their faith and that their suffering continues to produce perseverance, character, hope and love. Romans 5:3-5


The non-profit group, China Aid, is an advocate for the persecuted Church in China.

http://www.chinaaid.org/english/index.php
They posted the following:
Ways You Can Help Us and the Persecuted Christians in China:
Pray for them. You may refer to our press releases listed on this website.

Tell others about the persecution situation in China.

Write letters to your respective senators or representatives, and China government's diplomatic officials. (I have already started on a letter)

Make tax deductible donations to help our investigation and advocacy efforts.

I would add another one here. Not to forget about the persecution in China but to look at the below sites daily and become an expert on whats going on there so that you may be an advocate to everyone you meet.

This is another great website for the pesecuted Church worldwide.
http://www.persecution.net/

For those of you that want to get more involved and have have ministry experience there is a great need for missionaries in China. One of the churches greatest needs is for teachers and pastors to come and educate them more about the Bible and Theology. If it works out Dan and I plan on going back to China in May to teach in the underground Church.
If you are interested in looking into this then I could probably put you in touch with the needed people.

The Season of Tranquility and Serenity

A serenity has swept upon the savanna of my soul as refreshing and tranquil as an alpine lake touching the morning sunset...
A coolness enraptures me as delicate as a ripple authored by a lily blossom dancingly dipping upon the water's shoreline...
A gleam glistens atop the water's shoal reflecting upon my eyes the afterglow of the setting stars...
Upon my heart and upon my soul the soft winds of waning summer set my heart afloat to drift upon that placid path of quiet passivity...
This season of contentment for me is incited by the ebb of summer and the flow of fall...
The marrow of my bones revives, dawning as a whisper ever so softly spreading slowly across my soul...
The azure sky is deeper, the winds are crisper, the sun is sadder, the air is sprightly and the lively fragrance nurtures peace...
The land is changing and yet I am in solitude...
As if from behind a mirror the world turns and the meadows of my soul only gently sway from the shifting winds...
An equinox of equity harmonized upon my being due to my affinity of the fall.